Responsibility.
Maturity.
Wisdom.
Grace.
Exploring interests.
Choosing friends.
Succeeding in life, however that looks.
These are all things we want to see our children develop and experience in their lives, right? They are goals and dreams we have for them, sometimes even before they are born! Wasn’t it fun to imagine what they would be like, look like, what their interests would be, before we had even met our precious babies? And now, each of us gets to see all of these things first-hand. It is the most incredible journey I’ve ever been on , and I’m betting you’d say the same. It surely isn’t an easy journey, but it is definitely the adventure of a lifetime. No matter what part of the journey you are on, I know that you’re rocking it. Yes, even when you’re tired. Even when you’re frustrated. Even when you feel like you’re failing. Please hear me well, mama. You. Are. Amazing. You are doing an outstanding job. Your children are thriving because of your love.
I encourage you to keep a journal of all of these moments and milestones. I know it feels like you’ll remember them forever without writing them down, but somehow as life marches on, they fade a bit. We forget those cute giggles, or funny little sayings that were actually just mispronunciations. We somehow no longer remember much of the frustration we feel as mamas that we are saying once again to pick up the towels, or clean up the dishes. These things kind of just sneak off into oblivion. Our constant reminders to use the bathroom, or stop biting finger nails, one day just stop being said. It’s hard to know when the final time any of these things will happen. That last trip to the park. The last time you need to drive someone to practice. The last “Mom, can I please…”. So write it down. Document your life’s work as a parent. You are quite literally changing the future. Isn’t that incredible?!
Motherhood looks different for each mama, because we are all different people, with different situations, and different goals. But I’m pretty sure that for everyone, motherhood runs in phases. For me the phases of motherhood have gone like this:
- Wishing to be a mom, but not pregnant. Buys a few baby items and puts them neatly in a box in the closet. Sneaks into closet to dream of the day a real baby will use these things.
- Finally pregnant. Sick beyond all belief, but grateful and I know it’s all worth it. Also, salad is gross and so is chocolate. Baby hates chamomile tea. Hoping the next pregnancy is better (it wasn’t, but still 100% worth it).
- Baby arrives via c-section. Not exactly the birth I had originally wanted, but I was so happy that everything ended up fine that I didn’t care. Repeat this the next time around, too.
- Infant stage. Happily take baby everywhere, since we’re exclusively breastfeeding. Baby snuggles are the best, and this time is too short. Also, sleep is overrated.
- Toddler stage. Woohoo, real food! Crawling and walking! Perhaps not the best combo, but that’s why we had a dog. (Cleanup on aisle…errrr…the whole house.) Cheerios everywhere. Dog gets a little fat. But this is so much fun!
- Preschool years. My favorite!!!!!!! Art projects galore!!!! Outdoor play all day! Water tables and sandboxes filled our days, along with themed snacks and trips to the farm and zoo. I discovered my favorite twistable crayons and small-sized markers for little ones, too! Also, tantrums. Haha.
- Kindergarten. A big change…real school, even at home. So much intentional learning! Letters, numbers, writing, reading…you name it! And the books! So many books. Begin trips to the library, where the adventures continue. Also the library late fees. And lost books. But still so much fun!
- The Elementary years. Working on responsibility. Teaching them about chores. Helping them learn to cook. Discovering their own opinions…not always enjoyable for mom, but cool to see. Messy projects, more pets, adventures getting bigger, lots of imaginative play. So much food. Dog continues to enjoy floor-snacks.
- Middle School. Guiding them without being obvious, but still strong-handed in instruction. Constant monitoring to make sure that chores are actually done, and done correctly. Mom is possibly considered “annoying” sometimes. Rooms are a train-wreck. Showers are not optional anymore. The most sincere, sweet smiles of gratefulness I have ever seen, and the occasional head leaning on my shoulder warms my heart like no other.
- High School. A different ballgame. A new reality. I am looking into the eyes that are either my height or taller than me, and giving advice similar to what I would say to my friend, rather than my child. Surreal, bittersweet, incredible. The feeling of watching my kids grow up to be everything I dreamed, and so much more than I could fathom, all at the same time. The pride I feel that makes my heart nearly burst. Those eye rolls, though. The 25 cups and plates in their room. The excitement as they embark on their own paths. The longing to slow down time, and the pulling at my heartstrings I feel in knowing they have only a few short years left under our roof.
And then what comes after this??? Well, I haven’t gotten there yet. I haven’t seen those future phases of motherhood, so I can only imagine what they will be like. The college admissions. The jobs. The relationships. The weddings. The grandkids. The memories. I love this journey we are on, and I am so glad it doesn’t end when high school is over. As for homeschooling, well, that part does end. Can I tell you a secret? I am not actually looking forward to that part. I love teaching our kids. It’s my favorite. I am already trying to prepare my heart for moving forward after homeschooling is finished, but it isn’t easy! Until then though, I think I’ll pour another cup of coffee, turn on some music, and watch them work. Taking it all in today…may blessings and joy abound for you, too, whether you’re in one of the first phases of motherhood, or much farther down the path than I am!